How To Love the Narcissist AND Keep Him? Two opposing strategies:
1. Be like his dead mother: cold, rejecting, selfish, absent, unsafe (triangulate, cheat, betray), approach-avoidant, fake. This leads to the narcissist trauma bonding with you in order to reenact early childhood conflicts and results in devaluation, discard, and replacement (separation-individuation) and then hoovering (if no mortification is incurred).
2. Be the opposite of his mother: conform to the snapshot.
Cope with Abuse: Background Noise Technique: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Auz0f8jYfiY
If You Love a Narcissist, This is For You: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uo74QE3Le5o
Act as “background noise”: ask no questions, never criticize or disagree, when addressed confine your response to the issues broached and do not introduce new topics into the conversation. In short: never initiate or be proactive – always react meekly, compliantly, and subserviently.
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